Ok. I was "ok" with my grades. They aren't the best, but that one is the best I could do, considering all the other classes I had. I am sure I could have gotten better if it was the only class I took but thats not going to happen. I wasn't thrilled, but now I am angry.
Sue called. She is the one I helped all the time, and told me how they got extra credit in logic for this, that, and the other thing. (one thing that us online weren't offered at all, I might add). Her first test she took in that class was a D, but they got to print it out, correct it, and got to bump the grade up. My first test was a D, but there were 7 questions that weren't complete so I took a screenshot and sent them to the instructor. She said there was nothing she could do, and when I asked if I could redo it, was told NO. I had to stick with the D. Not happy. Sue got an A out of the class, and would call me up bawling cos she didn't get it. I helped her through a lot of it, and she got an A. I would do it again, but I would be just as angry as I am now. She is on the deans list this semester. She keeps telling me not to feel bad. I do, and I am pissed as well.
The "friend" who seems is in competition with me is also in finals this week. She has already started emailing me all her A grades, and has been asking how I did. I don't want to tell her. I call her a friend, and she is in some ways, but true friends don't act like she does at times. She uses me as a stepping stone to make her feel better about herself. I don't need the pressure. I have enough self esteem issues of my own. I know people expect me to always be the better person and not say things that will hurt someones feelings, but sometimes I want to scream at them. I don't want to be as petty as they are. Honest. I care about grades. I don't care that she has a newer car. Its never one I would have gotten for myself, but she thinks its better, so I let her cos it makes her feel better. My b'f is far from perfect, and not the guy for me, but at least he isn't in prison like hers is. Mine didn't borrow $500 from me to buy Christmas presents with. But she couldn't help but gloat over all she got for Christmas and her birthday. Of course she didn't tell me till he got sent to prison that what she didn't pay for he used funny money on.
I am just angry that I get computer logic better than my friend, but she got the better grade. She has been asking everyone and it seems that I am the only one at my school, maybe in the whole planet that got a C. :(( I really am happy for her. REALLY. I'm pissed at the instructor. I'm pissed that I am a lousy test taker, no matter how I try different things to get better. I'm pissed that life isn't fair. I'm pissed that the place I worked decided my job could be cheaper performed in Mexico and put me in this situation. I am pissed that my sons dad is such an asswipe. I am pissed that I can't lose any weight. I am pissed that I am loyal to a b'f who doesn't even trust me.
I think its time for the wine cooler I have been saving in the fridge. Not really saving it, just forgetting its there. I better drink it now since its shouting my name.
God bless, and please forgive me for being bitter. I will try again later to be the better person, pull myself up by the bootstraps, and give it all another go.