Thursday, January 27, 2005

Buried under a mountain of homework....

Holy crap. I have about 6 days worth of work and its due Monday. I sure don't have time to be here, but I need to relax for a few minutes. I put in my Vivaldi Cd and it seems to be working. I can feel some of the stress running down and pooling around my ankles. Ahhhhhhhhh

I went to the company dr. today. My attorney told me how important it was for me to stress the type of jobs I was doing to cause the carpal tunnel. I did that the first time. I felt intimidated today. Not because of anything he said or did, but all I could think of was that he thought I lied. I know they say you can tell when someone lies by the body language, but thats not always true. I am so (insert appropriate word here, just don't tell me what it is.) that if someone accuses me of something, I feel guilty and act guilty. I think sometimes maybe I flipped out and actually did what they accuse me of. I am the most honest person I know. I used to lie when I was a kid, but it was too hard to keep track. When I would get caught there was a price to pay and it was too steep. After telling the truth for awhile, I found out it is so much easier. A lot less work. People with bad memories should never lie. My son tries, but gets caught. He is upset with me now cos he keeps making promises to me he won't keep. I told him I can't believe anything he tells me, so there are consequences. He didn't bring his homework home last night, and told me he turned it in. I found his folder and the same thing was in it that was there the night before. I made him write sentences out of all 15 words instead of 10, and he got no tv for the whole evening. He cried when he went to bed cos he didn't get any tv. Today when he got home, he did his work, then he watched a short DVD then turned off the tv. I was shocked. :D

This new computer is great. I love the DVD player on it. I haven't burned a cd yet though, and I don't have any DVD's yet. There isn't anything on here that would fill up that much space anyway yet.

Back to the dr. visit. I called my attorney when I got home cos he wanted me to. Luckily he was out of the office so I left him a voice mail. I really dropped the ball on this one. I told him I felt too intimidated and didn't speak up for myself like I should have. The dr. didn't even know why they had sent me back there anyway. I told him they told me to come, so I did. He thinks I will get complete movement back in my hands. They are still tender for now, and I found out I have to clap like a real priss. The scars are real tender still. I have to keep rubbing them out so it will look and feel more normal. If the dr. says its still not work related, I probably won't get a settlement. All because I don't have the guts to speak up for myself. They make me feel like I am trying to scam money from the company and I'm not. But then I feel quilty. I have no idea why. I am always like this. I think I need to get a life. Oh, wait a minute, I am TOO BUSY for one.

I best get back to the books. God Bless, and keep me and mine in your prayers.

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