Thursday, June 09, 2005

My dad and speech.

I got a call from my stepmother last night. She wanted to check on the dog while they are gone., and I guess make sure the house is still standing. They will be home Friday instead of Sunday. She said that the dr. called and something is going on with his heart according to the monitor they had on him. She had told me before they left that he may need a pacemaker, but he said he isn't going to do it cos he is tired. I understand. But I don't want him to go, and its very selfish of me. I guess we will see what happens. She said they need to get back so they can get a medicine for him anyway. They are having a good time, which was the whole point. Really, its a good idea for any vacation to have a good time. Doh!

Everyone got to give the introductory speech yesterday. My voice wasn't normal, my face was red, and I was clutching my paper like it was a rope holding me while I was dangling off a cliff. They didn't get to see my face much, but they sure got a look at the part in my hair. :( I kept trying to focus on speaking clearly and slowly. When I am nervous I have a tendency to talk really fast. I had my Expectation Paper that was due complete, and getting over the fear of speaking in front of a group was first on the list. It went ok, but I have a long way to go before I am comfortable.

I found out I got approved for my loan on the roof. She said the approval letter should be going out in the mail today. Then I can call the roofer and get on the schedule. YAY! I will call my pastor this afternoon if I haven't heard anything by then to see if he came out and looked around yet. They may help with some of the labor if possible so it might lower my bill some. His office is about 2 blocks away from the contractor so I told them I may let them talk it out and see what they can do together. It would be great to get a lower bill, then I wouldn't have to use all of my savings. It will be great not to worry about critters in the attic anymore. We might even start sleeping upstairs in our beds and not in the living room. That would be unique.

I feel funny calling him my pastor when I don't go to church there anymore, but since we don't go anywhere and I am still a member there I guess its ok. I didn't get in touch with them to see what they can do for me, I emailed him to see if he knew of any agencies that replace roofs. Some don't have to pay anything for certain income guidelines, but its based on the county too. Oh well. My payments will be cheap for the next 20 years, and no coons in the attic. What more could a girl ask for? :)

Tomorrow is a free day. G loves the babysitters house. He has been swimming in their pool, playing on the trampoline, and playing X Box. I know I am protective, but they let their grandson listen to stuff I won't let G, watch violent stuff, play with guns, and play violent games on x box and playstation. Then they wonder why he gets so violent. I will be glad when he is away from there, but he won't be. I think he wants to live there now. I don't know if its fair of me to feel that way, but he is only 8 and there is way too much violence in the world. When I went to get him Tuesday, his first day there, he came out of the bedroom looking like GI Joe after a sale at the local weaponry shop. I know he is growing up. But he is only 8. My baby boy. I don't want him to get desensitized to the violence aspect. After awhile some things just don't seem quite so wrong anymore. I want him to have fun, and learn and grow into a great human being. He may need to be at their house some next week. I will need to see if my parents are ready to watch him when they get back. They may need a week or so to see whats going on with dad before they take my kid over. At least he will still have some fun with my stepmother. They both like to fish and she will have a fishing buddy. He will be in paradise.

Time to go. School waits for no man. Or woman. God Bless.

2 comments:

SunGrooveTheory said...

Oh, Angel, I empathize with your emotions regarding your dad, and I will keep him in my prayers.

You also remind me of when I took intro-speech, a couple years ago. I think the trick is to psyche yourself out that it's going to be really fun, that you're excited about what you have to say about your topic. Find something interesting that no one else will know, or quirky and funny, and then think about how awesome it will be when you share it with them- imagine the smiles on their faces, or looks of surprise when you tell them a little-known fact...
Good luck, God Bless! :)
-SGT

Angelize said...

Thanks so much. I know how much I miss my mom still, and I hate to see my dad get worse. I really appreciate you and your prayers. Take care. (I still think I like your hair darker red.) :))