Sunday, April 17, 2005

The birthday is over...

and the night is winding down. I think b'f had a good day. He kept saying he did. He was upset this morning when I called him. He had been thinking about us ditching him and his son yesterday. Its ok if they cancel us, but something is up if we cancel on them. Last summer we didn't get to see his son hardly at all because he was in band and in parades all over the country- side. We weren't invited. He said later he didn't think we would want to go. I looked at it as a break, but he didn't see yesterday that way. Oh well. I had my defense all planned, and he would have felt like shit when it was all done, but I didn't want to do that on his birthday. I'm glad he didn't bring it up today after we got there.

We got there barely in time for church, then went to KFC buffet as planned. Next, we went hiking through the woods. Not the greatest thing to do on a full stomach, and the humidity was up today. I got some good pictures though. Next he decided on Dairy Queen. The boys got into it some there. Then we decided to play pool. Big mistake. His son never takes responsibility for himself. He is perfect in every way. We were all lousy today, and I think we all had heat stroke or something. B'f was better than the rest of us put together, which still wasn't saying alot. Well, the favorite son was having a bad time of it, because all the pool cues were crap. None of them were any good, and he tried them all. The table was messed up somehow, and no one set the balls up for him like they did for the rest of us. Geesh. Anyway, b'f and son were on one team, and me and G were on the other. B'f scratched on the 8 ball. Favorite son got IN HIS FACE, yelling at him like he was a dog telling him it was all his fault that they lost. I blew my cool. B'f was standing there taking it. FROM A 12 YEAR OLD!!!!!!! I blasted him a new one. I told him NEVER talk to his father that way, and he should be ashamed. He is rude, and disrespectful. Here it is his dad's b'day and he is in his face screaming. He looked at his dad like "aren't you going to yell at her for talking to me like that????" and his dad didn't say a word. I apologized later to b'f for going off on his son, but told him I couldn't stand it when he did that. He said he thought it was "sweet". I told him tonight on messenger he is going to have to demand respect, otherwise it is only going to get worse. My son is 8, and he has tried to test the waters, and he barely gets his feet wet before he realizes its not the way to go. My son can be a jerk, but his son takes the cake. B'f used to have the attitude that since he doesn't live with him that his job is just to sit back and see how he grows up. I told him since we have the job of parents, its our job to make sure they grow up to be the best human beings they can be, whether they like us all the time or not. I realize that is easier said than done, since I don't have to share the parenting with anyone else. I can be cavalier with my attitude, because my son has no one else to run to or want to live with if I piss him off. But I know his son won't respect him if he gives him free reign to act anyway he wants. He sees him as a wimp and a loser now as it is. To stand there and calmly take it while he is being screamed at by a kid whose mom still wipes his nose for him, really pisses me off. That's one reason I find it hard to respect him as well.

Well, I am off to bed. I was up from 2 till 5:30 this am, then got back up at 7:30 and had to get ready for an hour and 15 minute drive to b'fs house. I am wiped out. Good thing the sermon was kind of quiet. No one mentioned me snoring, so I must have been quiet. (oops!)

God Bless, and pray for parenting skills for parents everywhere. Its a tough job, and the pay really sucks, but the fringes are out of this world. ;)

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