Tuesday, December 07, 2004


I don't think of being poor, as in poor. I just don't have money. I have food, for now, I have a house, for now. It can all change in a heartbeat, thats true. I worry a lot about the bills coming in. I will probably have to get a part time job, but I want to get settled in my new schedule at school to see what I can fit in. School is very important to me. I don't want to be like this the rest of my life. I am too freakin old for this.
I got a letter from the school today. I was expecting it to be about my son having to go to Saturday school (again. ) He was rowdy once, climbed under a desk once, (to retrieve something, he said,) and forgot to put his name on his paper 3 times. So he gets Saturday school. Again. :( I know the name thing may not sound like a big infraction, but he has been told repeatedly. I don't want to take away from what they are trying to do, because I understand it. I don't know how else to handle this either. At least once a week, I ask him, "whats the first thing you do when the teacher hands you a paper?" He rolls his eyes and says, "put my name on it."
Back to the letter, it wasn't about Saturday school. They have a food basket for us we are to pick up Saturday morning. I HATE that I am in no better financial shape than I am now. It makes me sad and embarrassed. I think I have done well for a single mom with no outside income. Its been 8 years since he was born, and I am buying a house, paying the bills on time, but I don't know how long I can keep it up. I wish I was done with school and could get a good paying job, instead of settling for whatever comes along. The economy is getting worse everywhere I look. Jobs are leaving here fast.
My surgery on my right hand is in the morning. I am not looking forward to that either, but I think it will be better in the long run. I can't honestly go for another job when I have a bad hand before I even start. I think it will just be better to get it over with, and the insurance is only good through January. (I think.) Sometimes life sucks, but I am sure there are a lot of people who have it a lot worse than me. I have to keep telling myself that.
Have a great day. I have to get the house in good order before class tonight. (another test, then next week is the final) I won't be able to do dishes for a few days, and then only one handed for a week. We need to get the decorations for Christmas up too. Bah Humbug!

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