Saturday, May 06, 2006

Almost done

One week left to go. I have 3 exams on Wednesday and one on Friday. A lot of prayer for me would be very appreciated.

I found myself snapping at my son all day today. He talked all day long, from the minute he woke up till about 20 minutes ago. I could have sworn he didn't take his meds today. I asked him nicely to calm it down. He started making all kinds of noises. He was testing me, and my patience was gone. I was getting really angry. We went and got groceries, and I lost it. I know if anyone heard us they would have thought I was an awful person. He would go off making some outrageously loud obnoxious noise, and instead of saying "calm down, or be quiet" I would clench my teeth together and go "SHUT UP!!!!!" I hate that phrase. The kid was driving me crazy, and was enjoying it. We stopped at BK after shopping, and I realized I only had one cup of coffee today, so I was having caffiene withdrawals. I quit drinking pop again, so I haven't had a diet pop in about 2 weeks. Until today. I can feel the blood coursing through my veins again. I AM WOMAN, HEAR ME ROAR! I love caffiene. I don't even feel like roaring at my kid. Maybe cos he went to bed and is being quiet. :)

We had city wide rummage sales in town today. We took the stuff that was leftover from the last sale. We set it up at a ladies house that my stepmother used to work for. It was about 7 am, and it was set in the paper to start at 8. People started coming as soon as we got there, and they already had about 3 massive tables of stuff set out. The lady started screaming (I am not kidding) that the sale didn't start till 8 and we weren't open yet. I think she thinks she is doing the public a favor by letting them touch her stuff with the option to buy. My philosophy on that is, if you see anything you want, buy it. If there is a box we haven't unpacked that looks good to you, feel free to root around in it. A sale is a sale. At the end of the day, the old bitty only made about $25, my stepmother made $124, and she almost threw all the stuff away after the last sale. She said it wasn't worth dealing with. Its a pain in the butt, and I really hate rummage sales anymore, but she had some nice stuff. I quit going since I end up buying someone elses junk and never use it. The only thing I have bought in the last few years (besides a few articles of clothing for the kid) was a cloth angel who sits proudly on my shelf in the living room. She is a beautiful whimsical country angel.

I had my first session with my new therapist yesterday. She seems very nice. She said I don't give myself enough credit for what I do, the same the therapist-in-training said. I don't know if she read it on the chart or what. We had a nice talk. She said it sounds like I am doing all the right things for G. I am so worried I'm not. I don't want his life to be as screwed up as mine was. I know how it feels to be picked on as a kid. I felt better after talking to her. I started reading a book called Raising an ADHD Child, A Parents Handbook, (or something like that. I care more about the content than the title of the book.) I haven't made it very far into the book, but at least I feel that I am not alone anymore in the way I feel, the way he is being treated, and the reflection that is put on me as the parent. Thank goodness there are others out there. Anyway, once this week is over, I plan on devoting a lot of time to walking and reading this book.

I haven't been going for walks like I was before. Too many projects due and not enough time. I have one homework assignment due for Monday, which is actually a practice final for math, which is going to be very helpful on remembering what all we covered for the semester. I am going to do it tomorrow. Then I just have to concentrate on studying for the finals, and I can have some downtime. The kid goes to school for a couple more weeks after I am done, so I will have some free time to go for walks by myself, nap when I want, and get caught up on Dr. Phil and The View. ;)

I better get to bed. God Bless, and say a prayer for me. Thanks.

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