We went to a baby shower for my niece today. She looks great. She still has a little over a month to go, but she is happy and smiling. I have never seen her so happy. She has "the glow" We rode over with my stepmother, and it was enjoyable. My sister was going to be there, so my son wanted to go so he could see her.
I have never seen so many gifts. It took 2 solid hours of opening to get them all unwrapped. She got doubles of a lot of things, but luckily, I must have chose wisely, as nothing there resembled mine. Registries online are wonderful things.
My son has been watching the Blues Brothers a lot. I love the movie, and he does too. There are a few places I would rather him not notice, but he does. He knows when they say a bad word, he points it out to me. Within the first 5 minutes, they mention condoms. Sealed, and soiled. We got home, and were getting out of my stepmothers car, when he said he had a question. He said, "what does soiled mean?" I knew what he was getting at, so tried to fend him off, but he kept going. "On the Blue's brothers they talk about soiled........" I blurted out "NOT CLEAN" and my stepmother agreed. I was so afraid he would say the condom word. I don't want to have to explain sex to him yet,and therefore he would have a lot more questions about condoms. He doesn't even like girls yet.
I don't know when I need to talk to him about this. I don't think he is ready yet. He knows it takes 2 people to make a baby, but thats as far as he knows. I don't know if I am too protective, or just a lousy mom. :( Any suggestions?
God bless.
Saturday, October 29, 2005
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
Well...
It's a good thing they took my dad to a heart center. They ran tests and found out its not his heart. Dad thought before it was his reflux or something causing him so much pain, and he might have been right all this time. They are going to run some other tests in the morning, and maybe send him home. I hope they figure out whats going on and how to make him comfortable soon.
Thanks for praying.
God Bless.
Thanks for praying.
God Bless.
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
Prayer request
My dad went into the hospital Sunday night, and I didn't find out till Monday evening. They live about 100 foot from my back door. The reason they called was because they wanted me to go let the dog out. :(
He is in very poor health. He has heart problems, which is the main thing going on right now. He is diabetic. He has pulminary fibrosis, which is getting worse. He has had angioplasties, a quintuple bypass, and numerous other things done. He is tired. Somedays he wants to give up. I understand. He is ready to go. Or so I thought. He is having a pace maker put in tomorrow. I know he is doing it because my stepmother wants him to.
He had another episode about 1 am. Please pray that God's will be done. I don't want him to die, but I understand. It's so hard to see him in pain and deteriorating. He can be cantakerous, argumentitive, and downright hard to get along with. He is also the funniest man I know. We have had lots of ups and downs, to put it mildly. They had talked it over when they found out I was pregnant with G and decided that I should give him up for adoption. That really about did in our relationship for good. We made it through it, even though it was a long hard road.
I love my dad. Please pray that God's will be done.
God Bless.
He is in very poor health. He has heart problems, which is the main thing going on right now. He is diabetic. He has pulminary fibrosis, which is getting worse. He has had angioplasties, a quintuple bypass, and numerous other things done. He is tired. Somedays he wants to give up. I understand. He is ready to go. Or so I thought. He is having a pace maker put in tomorrow. I know he is doing it because my stepmother wants him to.
He had another episode about 1 am. Please pray that God's will be done. I don't want him to die, but I understand. It's so hard to see him in pain and deteriorating. He can be cantakerous, argumentitive, and downright hard to get along with. He is also the funniest man I know. We have had lots of ups and downs, to put it mildly. They had talked it over when they found out I was pregnant with G and decided that I should give him up for adoption. That really about did in our relationship for good. We made it through it, even though it was a long hard road.
I love my dad. Please pray that God's will be done.
God Bless.
Sunday, October 23, 2005
A day full of surprises
My son got an aquarium for his birthday. He got it Wednesday. My parents got it for him during the day, and as soon as I got home I had to go to their house, lug it home, and get it all set up since they had ALREADY BOUGHT FISH!!!!!! They got him a couple of goldfish, which kind of spoiled it, since now we are stuck with goldfish. I knew they were getting him an aquarium, but I thought they would at least let us go fish shopping after getting it set up properly. No luck this time. They spent about $10 getting the basics, and the next night I spent $60 getting the filter, hood, etc. Now on to the next part.
He got $20 for his birthday. I let him spend it yesterday as he saw fit. He spent it all on the aquarium. He now has a skeleton in the water with his head bobbing up and down with air bubbles. It was something he really wanted, so now its his. There are other things he is wanting for it, so I told him he is going to have to earn it. He has a responsibility chart now that we just got about a week ago but never put up. He put it up yesterday and have been marking it up ever since. Today, besides going to church and his school sing program, he:
We just lost one of the fish. :( We lost the only "gold" goldfish. (he has a white one, and two black and gold). We gave it a burial at sea, and he was sniffling. He has been overfeeding, so I think they are pooping too much. I told him not to be surprised if we lose others, and to slow down on the feeding. I know they always look hungry, but they will be ok.
God Bless, and thank God for responsibility charts. :)
He got $20 for his birthday. I let him spend it yesterday as he saw fit. He spent it all on the aquarium. He now has a skeleton in the water with his head bobbing up and down with air bubbles. It was something he really wanted, so now its his. There are other things he is wanting for it, so I told him he is going to have to earn it. He has a responsibility chart now that we just got about a week ago but never put up. He put it up yesterday and have been marking it up ever since. Today, besides going to church and his school sing program, he:
- took out trash
- replaced trash bag
- brushed teeth
- said please and thank you for meals
- actually ate his meals
- DID DISHES!!!!
- cleaned up his room
- made his bed
- sorted through some of his tapes and sold his excess to the neighbor for her grandkids. :)
We just lost one of the fish. :( We lost the only "gold" goldfish. (he has a white one, and two black and gold). We gave it a burial at sea, and he was sniffling. He has been overfeeding, so I think they are pooping too much. I told him not to be surprised if we lose others, and to slow down on the feeding. I know they always look hungry, but they will be ok.
God Bless, and thank God for responsibility charts. :)
Well rounded, or just weird?
I have always felt like I didn't belong. I don't think I am like the "normal" people that live in my area. It's just the little things, but I think that helps define the person.
I have always like classical music. Beethoven, Mozart, Wagner, Vivaldi, the classics. When we were in the 6th grade we had a reading assignment to read as many quality books as we could. I got into biographies, and one of the first was of Beethoven. I read various ones, and that was the beginning of my love of the music. I didn't realize that I could come off as odd with this enjoyment, and when it dawned on me that others didn't feel this way, I became a secret listener.
I started experimentation with plants as a young adult. Oh sure, I started slow. First was peppermint, then spearmint, lemon balm, orange mint, and a few others. Thus started my herbal tea garden. My dad came over one day after I had moved out on my own. I was listening to my Beethoven albums, and offered him a cup of herbal tea. He just shook his head, and asked me whose child I was. He said I didn't learn any of that living in his house. I took it as a compliment. I didn't learn much in his house, except how to fight with siblings and survive among step siblings. I learned how fine upstanding Christians can be so hypocritical behind the churches back, and learned what incest was all about. I was glad I was capable of gleaning other things out of life than what I was surrounded with.
My music collection is a bit outdated now. I don't care for most of the music of today. I am stuck back in my happy times. I have a good sized collection of classical, contemporary gospel (as contemporary as 9 years ago) oldies, sprinkled with all of Unkle Kracker, Kenny G, Cheap Trick, Journey, etc. (I guess those would fall under oldies to some. LOL)
I am afraid I am corrupting my son. B'f was over last night and we watched Sleepless in Seattle. He had never seen it, and I love it and was wanting to watch it again. G didn't want to watch it, and didn't keep it a secret. He was in a mood last night and talked all evening long. ALL EVENING LONG. He finally settled in to the movie. I don't know if anyone remembers the soundtrack, but its pretty enjoyable for me. Of course, I am a 46 year old woman. I noticed my son started singing. He knew the words to most of the songs. I don't know how a lot of that happened. Granted, one of the songs he learned from the Blues Brothers. He loves them as much as I do. He was even telling someone the other day that he really likes the Blues now that he knows what it is. :)
With his knowledge, and not knowing that people around here don't usually talk of such things, is he going to be considered weird like I felt all my life? Or just well rounded? I will never stop teaching him the things that will help his mind to grow. I don't want him to hide his knowledge like I did. He is truly an amazing individual. He still loves him mom, and doesn't seem embarrassed by me, yet. I imagine the day will come. But I will come home, pop in The Blues Brothers movie, and remember happier times.
God Bless.
I have always like classical music. Beethoven, Mozart, Wagner, Vivaldi, the classics. When we were in the 6th grade we had a reading assignment to read as many quality books as we could. I got into biographies, and one of the first was of Beethoven. I read various ones, and that was the beginning of my love of the music. I didn't realize that I could come off as odd with this enjoyment, and when it dawned on me that others didn't feel this way, I became a secret listener.
I started experimentation with plants as a young adult. Oh sure, I started slow. First was peppermint, then spearmint, lemon balm, orange mint, and a few others. Thus started my herbal tea garden. My dad came over one day after I had moved out on my own. I was listening to my Beethoven albums, and offered him a cup of herbal tea. He just shook his head, and asked me whose child I was. He said I didn't learn any of that living in his house. I took it as a compliment. I didn't learn much in his house, except how to fight with siblings and survive among step siblings. I learned how fine upstanding Christians can be so hypocritical behind the churches back, and learned what incest was all about. I was glad I was capable of gleaning other things out of life than what I was surrounded with.
My music collection is a bit outdated now. I don't care for most of the music of today. I am stuck back in my happy times. I have a good sized collection of classical, contemporary gospel (as contemporary as 9 years ago) oldies, sprinkled with all of Unkle Kracker, Kenny G, Cheap Trick, Journey, etc. (I guess those would fall under oldies to some. LOL)
I am afraid I am corrupting my son. B'f was over last night and we watched Sleepless in Seattle. He had never seen it, and I love it and was wanting to watch it again. G didn't want to watch it, and didn't keep it a secret. He was in a mood last night and talked all evening long. ALL EVENING LONG. He finally settled in to the movie. I don't know if anyone remembers the soundtrack, but its pretty enjoyable for me. Of course, I am a 46 year old woman. I noticed my son started singing. He knew the words to most of the songs. I don't know how a lot of that happened. Granted, one of the songs he learned from the Blues Brothers. He loves them as much as I do. He was even telling someone the other day that he really likes the Blues now that he knows what it is. :)
With his knowledge, and not knowing that people around here don't usually talk of such things, is he going to be considered weird like I felt all my life? Or just well rounded? I will never stop teaching him the things that will help his mind to grow. I don't want him to hide his knowledge like I did. He is truly an amazing individual. He still loves him mom, and doesn't seem embarrassed by me, yet. I imagine the day will come. But I will come home, pop in The Blues Brothers movie, and remember happier times.
God Bless.
Friday, October 21, 2005
Another sleepless night....
There are more sounds in the attic. I have no idea what it could be. It doesn't sound big enough to be a raccoon, I don't think. The contractor came over today to give me the estimate finally on the window trimming and the back porch roof. I had him take a look around the outside and he couldn't figure out where anything could get in. I called the pest control guy and he said maybe to throw some moth balls in the attic and it might deter whatever it is. Here I went and got a new roof, new front porch, mainly because I can't stand the thought of critters running in the ceiling over my head at night, and here they are again. :( No one really seems to know what to do, and I don't know myself. I did everything I know how to do. If b'f comes over tomorrow, I will have him throw the mothballs in the attic for me. I'm not going to open it up.
I should just go to bed now, but I doubt if I will sleep. I haven't been feeling well, and now my face feels hot. I haven't hardly eaten anything, and I haven't had hardly any caffiene, and my head is pounding. I took some more meds, and drank some caffiene, so I will see if that helps.
One of the girls I used to work with called me the other day and invited me to church. Its close to home, and G goes to school with some of the kids that go there. I have thought about going before, but the thought of not getting dressed till noon and sleeping in as long as possible have been too tempting. I told her I was going to call her and ask if I could go with her sometime, so it was an answer to a prayer. (probably my parents or my b'f's. LOL) I didn't even mention it to b'f. I know he will be thrilled so I should, but I am being a bitch about it I think. He will gloat, and offer to come here and go with me so he can check it out and make sure it is a good church and not some satan worshipping thing.
G had a great real birthday. I took him to class with me and he got to play on www.cartoonnetwork.com for the duration. I was glad I got to spend some time with him. He didn't use his dvd player he took with him, so we still had battery power left for the drive home. He had taken a cd to listen to as well, so we got to jam to some Big Band Swing for the 45 minute drive. A good time was had. I just can't believe he has been in my life for 9 years. In my dreams I never saw him this old, and was afraid I would lose him before now. I still think that sometimes when he gets on the bus, wondering if I will ever see him again. I think it will always be this way, till one day he won't come home.
God Bless, and hug your family and friends tight.
I should just go to bed now, but I doubt if I will sleep. I haven't been feeling well, and now my face feels hot. I haven't hardly eaten anything, and I haven't had hardly any caffiene, and my head is pounding. I took some more meds, and drank some caffiene, so I will see if that helps.
One of the girls I used to work with called me the other day and invited me to church. Its close to home, and G goes to school with some of the kids that go there. I have thought about going before, but the thought of not getting dressed till noon and sleeping in as long as possible have been too tempting. I told her I was going to call her and ask if I could go with her sometime, so it was an answer to a prayer. (probably my parents or my b'f's. LOL) I didn't even mention it to b'f. I know he will be thrilled so I should, but I am being a bitch about it I think. He will gloat, and offer to come here and go with me so he can check it out and make sure it is a good church and not some satan worshipping thing.
G had a great real birthday. I took him to class with me and he got to play on www.cartoonnetwork.com for the duration. I was glad I got to spend some time with him. He didn't use his dvd player he took with him, so we still had battery power left for the drive home. He had taken a cd to listen to as well, so we got to jam to some Big Band Swing for the 45 minute drive. A good time was had. I just can't believe he has been in my life for 9 years. In my dreams I never saw him this old, and was afraid I would lose him before now. I still think that sometimes when he gets on the bus, wondering if I will ever see him again. I think it will always be this way, till one day he won't come home.
God Bless, and hug your family and friends tight.
Monday, October 17, 2005
We love bowling!
That seemed to be the theme for the day Saturday. I took G and a couple of his buddies bowling for his birthday. He will be the big 9 this Wednesday. They had a great time. We had the bumpers set up, which turned out to be necessary. They all have their own "form" but it leaves a lot to be desired. One of the boys got the ball stuck between the bumper and the gutter. LOL. We had to have the guy come and get it out. B'f and his son were there too. It was only $30 for 2 games each. I didn't think that was too bad for 5 bowlers for an afternoon.
We came back to the house for ice cream cake from DQ. A good time was had by all. I took them home around 5, which made G mad. He wanted them to all stay the night. We had been invited to a neighbors cookout and Halloween party down the road, so I wanted to drop in there later. I have lived in this town for 9 years and don't know many. Being an extremely small town, I should know everyone by now. I am too much of a hermit so I thought it would be a good idea to go. Its my plumber and his family. We walked over about 7:30 and they had a bonfire going. It was a full moon, and the sky was really bright. B'f thought we should travel with flashlights since we were walking about 100 feet in the dark. Sometimes he makes me feel soooo old. We introduced ourselves, and his daughter took us around and showed us where the kids were all playing. I didn't realize till we got back that I didn't tell my b'f they were Mormons. I asked how he could tell, and he said he saw a giant "Book of Mormon" on the table when we went in the house. Well, yeah, that would do it. He, being the authority on all thing religious, looked at me like I took him to a sex show or something. I think he thinks since I don't go to church, I am therefore ungodly, and am trying to lead him astray by mixing with people outside of his religion. (insert giant eyeroll here)
We were chatting on yahoo last night, and he told me that he got some bad news, but he didn't want to spoil the party. He is getting his wages garnished for a debt he was taken to court for 2 years ago. They told him he had to pay a certain amount a week, but he was "hoping to work out a deal" so all this time he hasn't been paying. So now, its going to take a chunk of cash out of his check every week. I thought all this time he had been getting it paid down. He said he found out Thursday. I told him I knew something was bothering him but wasn't sure what. Thats when he said he saw the wine coolers in the fridge again, and that made his mood worse. I told him how they had been in there for 6 months. I don't think he believes me. I don't care. I keep thinking some evening I will have one to relax with, and then I forget. Booze lasts me a very long time. LOL
B'f said he probably won't be able to come over as much since this garnish thing. With the gas prices, and winter coming, its going to be tough for him. I wish I could help him out, but he won't help himself. He waits for someone to bail him out, and its not going to be me. He knows what he should have been doing all along, and it was his choice not to. I am hoping this is about the end of the relationship. Maybe the wine coolers will put him over the edge. I didn't do that on purpose, I just don't think there is anything wrong with it, as long as its not to excess. I don't think 6 wine coolers in about a years time is excessive.
I need to get ready for school.
God Bless. Even people of religions other than my own.
We came back to the house for ice cream cake from DQ. A good time was had by all. I took them home around 5, which made G mad. He wanted them to all stay the night. We had been invited to a neighbors cookout and Halloween party down the road, so I wanted to drop in there later. I have lived in this town for 9 years and don't know many. Being an extremely small town, I should know everyone by now. I am too much of a hermit so I thought it would be a good idea to go. Its my plumber and his family. We walked over about 7:30 and they had a bonfire going. It was a full moon, and the sky was really bright. B'f thought we should travel with flashlights since we were walking about 100 feet in the dark. Sometimes he makes me feel soooo old. We introduced ourselves, and his daughter took us around and showed us where the kids were all playing. I didn't realize till we got back that I didn't tell my b'f they were Mormons. I asked how he could tell, and he said he saw a giant "Book of Mormon" on the table when we went in the house. Well, yeah, that would do it. He, being the authority on all thing religious, looked at me like I took him to a sex show or something. I think he thinks since I don't go to church, I am therefore ungodly, and am trying to lead him astray by mixing with people outside of his religion. (insert giant eyeroll here)
We were chatting on yahoo last night, and he told me that he got some bad news, but he didn't want to spoil the party. He is getting his wages garnished for a debt he was taken to court for 2 years ago. They told him he had to pay a certain amount a week, but he was "hoping to work out a deal" so all this time he hasn't been paying. So now, its going to take a chunk of cash out of his check every week. I thought all this time he had been getting it paid down. He said he found out Thursday. I told him I knew something was bothering him but wasn't sure what. Thats when he said he saw the wine coolers in the fridge again, and that made his mood worse. I told him how they had been in there for 6 months. I don't think he believes me. I don't care. I keep thinking some evening I will have one to relax with, and then I forget. Booze lasts me a very long time. LOL
B'f said he probably won't be able to come over as much since this garnish thing. With the gas prices, and winter coming, its going to be tough for him. I wish I could help him out, but he won't help himself. He waits for someone to bail him out, and its not going to be me. He knows what he should have been doing all along, and it was his choice not to. I am hoping this is about the end of the relationship. Maybe the wine coolers will put him over the edge. I didn't do that on purpose, I just don't think there is anything wrong with it, as long as its not to excess. I don't think 6 wine coolers in about a years time is excessive.
I need to get ready for school.
God Bless. Even people of religions other than my own.
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